Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to
replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies
of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.
(Anais Nin)
Relationships
An intimate relationship is usually far more than sex.
Most relationships are about friendship, not sex - and sexual activities
are a background aspect rather the whole point.
Fidelity
Fidelity is a concept that prevails in modern society.
It is an unspoken agreement between a couple designed to establish and
maintain loyalty.
Having one sexual partner and no other is the primary rule of fidelity.
This situation is common and serves a number of purposes.
It
reduces the risk of sexually transmitted diseases entering the relationship, it
creates a closer emotional bond and it enables both parties to let their guard
down.
When a married person is unfaithful, it is called 'adultery'.
Marriage is one way in which people seek to legalise fidelity, but as with all
other concepts, fidelity is only as meaningful as you choose to make it.
In other words: it is your actions that make you faithful or not, rather than
your promises.
Commitment
A relationship represents a commitment.
Even though you may not be married, it is important to establish the
basis of your relationship.
If you want fidelity, make it clear.
Not everyone will share your values - so be explicit concerning
acceptable behaviour.
Most couples employ a 'look but don't touch' policy.
Blame
If your life feels to be in a rut and you are unhappy, do not blame your
partner.
Society is run by commerce and you are encouraged to feel dissatisfied.
Frustration, apathy and boredom produce a restlessness that makes you tense and
edgy.
You have needs that you cannot express or fulfil.
It probably has nothing to do with your partner.
If it does - be calm and composed about it - talk with them and move towards a
solution.
Image is not reality
Sexual attraction is
not without problems.
When aroused, a person is incapable of thinking clearly.
This is a primal mechanism designed to focus our attention on the acquisition of
sexual gratification.
Lust is natural but not without consequence.
Remember that if you chase the
image you have of somebody, that you are not pursuing the reality.
What is the person really like?
Are they moody?
People see what they want to see.
More...
Page created 19 August 2004